“Your addiction is not stronger than you. Though it may feel that way, it can only win if you let it.”

~Gary Zukav

“Between stimulus and response lies a space. In that space lie our freedom and power to choose a response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness.”

~Viktor Frankl  




Whether it’s s 10 years, 10 months, or 10 days of sobriety, all any of us really has is one day at a time. And the truth is, within that one day, we really only have this moment.

I see triggers and forces all over the place. Or, if I am paying attention, I can choose to see them as reminders that when I’m aligned with my Higher Power, and the Divine Infinite, I am free. I can choose not to engage in that behavior, verbal exchange, sweet treat, cocktail, or even thought – I can do a contrary action or no action at all.

That is why I value the work of strengthening up from the inside out so much. (Haven’t quite been able yet to master the regular practice of strengthening the physical on the outside …) But for me, the inner spiritual work is the key – it gives me the chance and the choice of how to respond (or not) in the moment.

It’s my responsibility to nurture my response-ability in the moment to assess the situation, know the truth, perhaps shift perceptions, and distance myself from my knee jerk reaction. That space between stimulus and response really is empowering. It’s a one-way-or-the-other path… and with mindfulness, awareness, and attentiveness it feels like that moment freezes in time enough for me to choose the sound path.

The craving does pass, I’ve learned. The thoughts of despair, revenge, or fear are just thoughts. They have no more power than that which I give them. Truth be told I sometimes still give them more power than they deserve, but overall more often than not, I can seize the moment which leads to so many less regrets.

It is in the pause that we have our power. From the everyday frustrations like traffic when I’m late, or a nincompoop’s annoying comment, or a larger, scarier event like an illness, I’m learning that my world is happier, lighter, and brighter when I respond mindfully

Pause when agitated… You will intuitively know how to handle situations… so many of these pithy little phrases pack a powerful punch of wisdom. They are Promises come to pass.

Putting them to action in the best possible way sharpens my response ability.


What is your strategy for responding in the way to best serve you / the situation?
Can you recall a specific occasion where you were grateful that you paused when agitated before responding?


In gratitude, harmony, and support,


4 thoughts on “Response-ability

  • April 20, 2018 at 10:17 pm

    My goodness, I have multiple pauses every day. I am starting to learn that many of my best decisions are made in a meditational-type moment. Taking an extra breath and waiting is golden😊

    • April 23, 2018 at 9:15 pm

      That is progress – so much better than being at the mercy of our ego and emotions and having no clue we’re doing it… ha – I saw we / our… I really mean me / my… Thanks for your comment…keep up the great work by the way….

  • April 23, 2018 at 8:16 am

    I have to really work on the pauses. Not only that but I need to work on speaking out when the situations have nothing to do with me. Yesterday my sister was speaking to someone at the hospital regarding her ill finance and she and I expressed our concern about him coming home. After words she did the opposite of which (we) talked about. I actually got mad about this..Not my Business..I screamed i my head. I find that I do this often. So I have a lot of work to do on pausing and think before I speak. When it comes to my sobriety I have no problem with pausing. One day at a time and I am grateful to God for my strength… But like it says I have to be very diligent every minute of every day.

    • April 23, 2018 at 9:10 pm

      That is interesting and positive that you can at least catch it in your head ( sometimes even before saying it!) and at least after… The awareness is the key. For me, the awareness, even in hindsight, gives me hope that I’m seeing things in new ways and might have a better chance at “zipping it” next time… ALSO it occurs to me that you noticed you were actually annoyed / angry about it – again that is a very powerful awareness. You can’t change / adjust what you’re not aware of, so all of that ties together to let you know you’re on the right track.. Thanks for your vulnerable sharing – I can relate.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *